


Mamma Mia!

by rosegoldwriting



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mamma Mia!, Bat Family, M/M, Weddings, bruce wayne is the dancing queen, the justice league is an 80s pop band
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-15 23:04:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15423600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosegoldwriting/pseuds/rosegoldwriting
Summary: Dick Grayson is about to marry the love of his life and wants nothing more than to spend the happy day with his family. There's only one problem: he isn't sure which of the three people he's invited is actually his brother.





	1. Honey, Honey

Dick had a dream. 

He had lots of dreams, actually. There was a lot of time to dream when you grew up with the ocean, a scarce amount of hotel guests, and your ex-billionaire-ex-popstar-turned-adoptive-father dad. 

But only one of those dreams was the reason he was sneaking out of his fiancé’s arms in the middle of the night. 

“Dick?” Wally mumbled, voice muffled by the pillow his face was stuffed in. 

“Sorry Walls,” Dick whispered in reply. “Bathroom.” 

Wally shifted so he could face Dick, eyes squinting in the darkness. “Gimme a kiss first.”

Dick laughed quietly and conceded, then pushed himself off the bed as Wally gave a happy hum and stuffed his face back into his pillow. He quickly grabbed the stack of invitations he had hidden in his dresser and left. 

Hiding the letters underneath his jacket, he walked along the worn-down paths of his father’s hotel. The sound of the ocean beating against the shore accompanied him to his destination. 

The mailbox.

Checking the addresses on the invitations one more time, Dick sighed, “Bruce is going to kill me,” and one by one, pushed them into the slot. 

“Jason Todd.”

“Tim Drake.”

“Damian Al Ghul.” 

Bruce was definitely going to kill him. 

 

***

 

“I’m getting married tomorrow!” Dick squealed, hugging Barbara as soon as she stepped off the small boat. 

“Really? I had no idea!” she replied, grinning as she hugged him right back. 

Dick took her hand and swung it between them as he walked them down the dock. “I’m so glad you’re here because I have something I’m dying to tell you because I couldn’t tell anyone, and it's driving me crazy to keep it a secret-” 

“Oh my God!” Barbara exclaimed in shock. “Are you pregnant?” 

“What? No!” Dick playfully punched her in the arm. “I invited my brother to my wedding!” 

“What?” Barbara exclaimed, stopping in the middle of the dock. “Bruce told you who he is?” 

“Not exactly....” Dick said as he surveyed the people around. “Just… just follow me! I’ll tell you everything.” He grabbed Barbara’s hand again and dragged her off of the dock and into the trees along the shore. 

“Okay. So.” Dick sat Barbara down on a rock. “As you know, back when Bruce was in the Justice League as a slutty, young, unknown popstar, he got some lady pregnant. Nobody knows about it except Bruce and her and me, even though I wasn’t supposed to know about it. And you, I guess, cause I told you.”

“Millions of times.” 

“Please save all sarcastic comments until the end. So, after I found out that Bruce has been paying child support for this sibling I never knew about, he gets all mad and tells me that the lady wants nothing to do with us and I shouldn’t put my nose into stuff that doesn’t concern me.” Barbara nodded in agreement. “BUT through that experience, I learned that somewhere in the world I have a brother who doesn’t even know me!” 

“And you want to meet him because you’ve been lonely in your dad’s Greek island hotel your whole life and wished you had siblings. Dick! I know all of this! Just get to the good, parent-disappointing stuff!” Barbara laughed. 

“Sorry, sorry! Anyways, I was snooping around my dad’s stuff and found this!” He held up a black, nondescript journal. “His journal!”

“Bruce is going to kill you.” 

“He wouldn’t kill me on my wedding day. I think.”

“I dunno, Dick. You’ve done a lot of stuff to piss your dad off, but this might take the cake.”

Dick promptly ignored her and cleared his throat. He began to read, “July 17th. Jason Todd attempted to steal my car tires today. His mother recently died from a drug overdose. Instead of pressing charges, I’m going to continue to support Jason until adulthood.”

“Bruce has such a way with words.”

“Doesn’t he? So short and simple.” 

“So this Jason person is your brother?” 

“That’s what I thought! But then like a month later he wrote this!” Dick flipped a few pages. “August 28th. Timothy Drake is very bright, and the passing of his mother has affected him greatly. Today he asked if I would ever consider paying for his tuition when he’s older, even though he will be an adult. Not sure why he’s already thinking about college at his young age, but I told him I would be happy to.” 

“So is Bruce some kind of orphan philanthropist now that he’s not singing anymore?” 

“I guess. And there’s still more! September 4th. Talia Al Ghul has left Damian with his grandfather and has requested that I stop sending money to support him. His grandfather will now be raising him.”

“So any of these kids could be your brother?”

“Well they’re not kids anymore. All this stuff happened before Bruce even adopted me.”

“Which one did you invite then?”

“Well…” Dick trailed off, fidgeting with the notebook. 

“Oh. My. God. Dick!” 

Dick smiled sheepishly. “And they think that Bruce is the one who invited them!”

Barbara’s jaw dropped. “Dick, Bruce is definitely going to kill you. I can’t believe I flew all the way to Greece just to have you be killed before your wedding.”

“Babs! This is the one thing I’ve wanted my whole life, and now I finally have it! Its my wedding, and my whole family will be there! At least pretend to be excited for me!” Dick lamented, pulling Barbara up to her feet. 

Barbara continued to console Dick on his soon-to-be untimely death as they resumed their trek up to the hotel. Laughing as Dick pushed at her, Barbara pulled Dick into a clumsy side hug and pressed a sloppy kiss on his cheek. “I can’t believe you’re getting married, Dickie. Wally’s a lucky man.” 

“I think Dick is the lucky one,” a new voice spoke. 

“Dad…” Dick huffed as Barbara happily exclaimed, “Bruce!” Bruce smiled and pulled her into a hug. 

“You two sound like you’re having fun already.” He paused and half-heartedly smiled. “I used to have fun.”

“Oh I know,” Barbara said, grinning. Dick elbowed her in the side. Bruce’s eyebrows raised. 

“Well, I’m going to go show Babs her bridesmaids dress! Bye dad!” Dick grabbed Barbara’s arm and pulled her up the stone stairs. As soon as they were away from Bruce, he hissed, “Could you tone down the dumbass?” 

“Sorry!” Barbara said. “But in my defense, who says stuff like that?” 

 

***

 

As soon as his taxi peeled onto the dock, Tim was thanking the driver and running out of the car. “Wait!” he called, waving his arm that wasn’t carrying a suitcase. The people on the ferry (which he was currently supposed to be on) waved back and smiled as they sailed farther away.

“Dammit.”

“My sentiments exactly,” stated the boy he hadn’t noticed standing next to him. He was also carrying a suitcase and was watching the ferry depart from behind his dark-tinted sunglasses, frowning slightly. 

“I need to get to Kalokairi,” Tim explained, making his way towards the board advertising the ferry. “When’s the next one?” 

“Monday,” the boy curtly responded. Tim cursed again. He was going to miss the wedding, he thought, grabbing the wrinkled invitation out of his jacket pocket. The boy in the sunglasses gestured to it and asked, “Grayson or West?” 

“Grayson,” Tim replied and then paused. “Though I’ve never actually met him.” 

“Hey!” someone interrupted. The two turned their heads to see a man with black hair with a bright white streak leaning against the wheel on his boat. “You two need a ride to Kalokairi?”


	2. Money, Money, Money

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Justice League is back for one night, and one night only. Except Bruce isn't the same carefree, dancing pop star he was during the 80's. And he's a lot less rich too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this out of character? yes  
> would bruce wayne ever be in an 80s pop band or sing any abba song ever? uhh probably not  
> but is this an alternate universe so i don't have to care about any of that? you betcha

Dick watched as Barbara admired her dress in the mirror. “It’s beautiful, Dick! Your wedding is going to be amazing.”

“I just want the perfect wedding,” Dick sighed. “And I want my family to be there to see it.”

“Oh, you’ll have plenty of family there to see it. Knowing which people are actually part of your family is going to be the hard part.”

“Babs!” Dick groaned. “I’ll know my brother when I see him.” 

A knock interrupted them before they could continue their banter. Before Dick could invite him in, Wally opened the door, grinning. 

“Wally!” Barbara exclaimed, moving away from the mirror to accept Wally’s hug. 

“You’d better watch where you put your hands, Babs, I’m getting married tomorrow!” Wally exclaimed as he embraced her. 

Dick laughed. “He’s getting impatient. If this were up to him, he’d have wanted a three-minute courthouse wedding in jeans and tshirts.” 

Wally scoffed playfully, putting a hand on his chest. “You make me sound so unromantic.” He turned to face Barbara. “I just thought that we could save our money for travelling.” 

“Well, we’re not going anywhere yet,” Dick reminded him as Wally made to grab some hats from their closet. “Anyways, we’re very busy so please leave.”

“Just getting some props for tonight, baby,” Wally said, winking at Dick as he left through the door. “Bachelor party squared tonight!”

As soon as the door shut again, Barbara faced Dick with a serious expression. “Does he know?” 

“About what?” Dick hummed.

“About your brother, Dickface!” 

“Of course not! He would try to stop me! Or...or make me tell Bruce!” 

“Dick, this can only end bad,” Barbara groaned, collapsing onto his bed. 

“Well by the time anyone finds out, it will be too late,” Dick said, flopping onto the bed and lying next to her. “I just… I feel like there's a part of my family missing, and when they’re here, everything will fall into place. 

 

***

 

“Excuse me! Coming through!” Clark shouted, pulling Diana along through the crowded ferry. “I have a senior citizen with me!” 

“We’re the same age.” 

“Well… parts of us are.”

The two made their way off of the ferry, clutching their bags, but promptly dropping them when they see who’s waiting for them on the dock. “Well would you look at what the tide brought in?” Bruce exclaimed. 

Diana and Clark laughed, moving so they stood back to back. Clark stuck one hand on his hip and, using the other as a microphone, shouted, “For one night!” 

“And one night only…” Diana continued. 

“THE JUSTICE LEAGUE!” all three exclaimed, as Clark and Diana ran down the dock to pull Bruce into a group hug. 

“You two look good,” Bruce said, pulling back from the hug. 

“And you look like an old hippie!” Clark said to Bruce as they piled into his rundown car. The car puttered to life, and they began the drive to the hotel. 

“So will there be any attractive, eligible bachelors and/or bachelorettes at this wedding?” Diana teased. 

“Oh, here we go!” Clark groaned. “Husband number 4!” 

“Not for me, for you!” Diana said. “Now that your book is a bestseller, and you’ve got the whole world making home cooked Kansas meals, it’s time to find Mr. or Mrs. Right!” 

“Boring!” Clark exclaimed.

“What a great couple of role models you two are for Dick. The serial bride and the little hermit over there,” Bruce said, pointing a thumb at Clark, who just laughed. 

“That’s me, I’m a lone wolf,” he said, starting to howl. 

Diana laughed and joined the howling before asking, “So when are those two love birds finally fleeing the nest?”

“Who knows,” Bruce sighed, steering the car around a sharp turn. “I don’t know what is going on in that child’s head sometimes. He wants this big wedding, and Wally and him have all these plans for the hotel. I’m not sure they’ll ever leave,” Bruce said as they pulled up to the hotel. He opened up the car door and started grabbing suitcases out of the back. 

“Well do you even want him to?” Clark asked knowingly. 

“I want what’s best for him.” Bruce paused. “So obviously not.” He spotted a familiar face coming down to meet them at the car. “Wally! Come meet my backup girls!”

“Backup girls, my ass!” they both exclaimed as Wally jogged over, grinning. 

“You must be Clark!” Wally exclaimed. “And you must be Diana. I’ve heard a lot about the two of you.” 

“All bad, I hope,” Diana said, hugging Wally. 

“And all true,” Bruce said, handing Wally a suitcase to carry. 

“Uncle Clark!” another voice exclaimed. Dick ran down the path to embrace Clark. 

“Look at Dickie, he’s so handsome!” Diana gushed. “I’ll bet he doesn’t even remember me.”

“Not with all that plastic surgery,” Clark said from over Dick’s shoulder. 

“Of course not, Aunt Diana! You haven’t changed at all,” Dick laughed, hugging the other member of the duo. 

“Neither has this place,” Clark said, kicking at the large crack in the middle of the path. 

“Hey! We’re modernizing,” Bruce said, gesturing to Wally. “Tell them about the internet. Wally is putting us on the line.”

“Online,” Dick corrected. 

“I’m designing a website,” Wally explained. “This place has a lot of potential, but nobody knows that it’s here. I feel like if we market it well enough, people will come flooding to Kalokairi!” 

“This place was going to be the site of Aphrodite’s fountain, the goddess of love! And if you drank the water, you were supposed to find true love and perfect happiness. It's the perfect romantic getaway,” Dick said, wrapping his arm around Wally. Wally pressed a kiss to his forehead. 

“I’ll have a glass of that,” Diana said.

“I’ll have a bucket,” Clark added, as Bruce dragged them away from the happy couple towards their room. 

“Do you really want boatloads of tourists?” Diana asked, skipping along the stone path. 

“Well maybe not boatloads,” Bruce said, grabbing the keys to unlock their room. “A few more would be nice.” Diana and Clark followed him in. “Okay. Now the thing about the bathroom. If it doesn’t flush the first time, just go. Wait a couple minutes. Then try again. It should work.” 

“Ah,” Diana said, cringing slightly. 

“Nothing works around here except for me. I’ve been running this hotel for 25 years and-” Bruce pushed open the window. The pane fell right off and smashed on the ground below. Someone screamed. “Sorry!” Bruce called. 

He turned back to face Diana and Clark. “We’re falling apart around here. Don’t think about it. Let’s go have fun.” 

“Fun? Do you even know how to do that anymore?” Diana teased. 

Clark picked up the bottle of wine on the coffee table. “If we get him drunk enough.”

“I don’t need to get drunk to have fun,” Bruce huffed. 

“Bruce, ever since we ended the Justice League, and you spontaneously moved to Greece, you’ve done nothing but work! What happened to our dancing queen?” Clark said, pouring glasses of wine. 

“God, please. Don’t call me that.” 

“Clark, its 11:00 in the morning,” Diana chided, but accepted the glass anyway. 

“Bruce just needs to marry someone rich or win the lottery. He was a lot more fun when he was a billionaire’s son, doing whatever he wanted. Now he’s an uptight, poor, single-father hotel owner,” Clark pouted. 

“It’s a rich man’s world,” Diana sighed. 

“Money, money, money,” Bruce groaned, downing his glass and reaching for the bottle. “I wish it was the 80’s again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter features the return of jason, tim, and damian! 
> 
> thanks for reading and for the kudos!!! two chapters today to give us a good start. see you sooon


	3. Mamma Mia!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dick's brothers arrive on Kalokairi. He should know which one is his brother as soon as he sees him, right? 
> 
> Right?

Dick was carrying a box of wedding decorations to the goat barn when he heard them. 

“How old are you anyways? 12? Is it legal for you to travel on your own?” 

“I am 18! How old are you, 35?” 

“Listen here, brat-”

Dick rounded the corner of the barn where three boys who couldn’t have been much younger than him were clutching suitcases and arguing. 

“If you’re going to spend this entire wedding trying to fight each other-” 

“Hi!” Dick greeted. “Can I help you guys?” All boys turned to him, straightening up and acting as if Dick hadn’t just interrupted their fighting. 

“We’re here for the wedding,” the tallest of the boys answered, wiping the glare off his face and replacing it with a lazy grin. “Jason Todd,” he introduced himself. 

Dick’s smile grew. His brother. 

“Tim Drake.” Dick panned his gaze to the best dressed of the three, long strands of hair tucked under his sunglasses. His smile faltered. Or was this his brother?

The youngest of the three crossed his arms and huffed, obviously not finished with the earlier argument. “Damian Al Ghul.” 

Dick gaped, panicking internally. He was supposed to know his brother when he saw him. So why didn’t he? Bruce is going to kill him. 

Sensing his confusion, Tim tilted his head. “You are expecting us, aren’t you?” 

“Oh my God,” Dick plastered on a blinding, yet fake smile. “Yes!” 

“You don’t happen to be the man of the hour, do you?” Jason asked. 

“That’s me,” Dick agreed. He’d be fine. He just had to get to know them, and then he’d know which one his brother is. Obviously. 

“Could we, uh, see our rooms?” Tim asked, moving towards the entrance of the hotel. 

“No!” Dick exclaimed. All three looked at him in shock. “I mean- Yes!” Shock turned to confusion. “Just… come this way instead.” Dick gestured with his head towards the barn. 

The boys turned to look at each other, attempting to have a secret conversation with their eyes, before Jason gave up, shrugged, and followed Dick through the entrance. 

 

***

 

Diana, Bruce, and Clark all sat as close as possible on the two person couch, nursing empty glasses of wine. 

“Oh my God,” Bruce said, sitting up suddenly. “There’s a crack in my courtyard, and my son is getting married tomorrow.” He made to get up when both of his friends pushed him back down.

“Bruce, Bruce,” Diana chided. “I know you’re going to make a fortune when Wally’s website is up, but are you going to be alright until then?”

“Can I go do my job please?” Bruce huffed, attempting to get up again. Diana and Clark held him firmly against the couch. 

“I think Diana is offering to pawn some of her bling,” Clark laughed. 

“I’m serious, Brucey-”

“Don’t call me that either.”

“Do you need a loan?”

Bruce choked. “I don’t need to be taken care of.”

“Yes, but are you being taken care of?” Diana asked. “Are you getting any?”

“Please stop.”

“That takes too much energy for Bruce. He already has enough plumbing to-” Bruce cut Clark off by slapping a hand over his mouth. 

“That part of my life is over,” Bruce said calmly. “And I’m glad.” The sarcastic comment that Clark tried to make was muffled against his palm. 

 

***

 

Dick pushed the trapdoor to the attic of the barn open and climbed up, beckoning the three others to follow him up. Tim eyed a bleating goat before grudgingly following. 

The four boys stood in the cluttered attic, Dick nervously clutching his hands behind his back. “You know,” Damian started, gazing confusedly at the makeshift beds on the ground, “I don’t want to seem ungrateful for the… scenic tour, but could we be shown our actual rooms now?”

“Don’t hold your breath, Dames, but I think this might be it,” Jason said, gracefully plopping himself on one of the makeshift beds. 

“Do not. Call me that,” Damian growled. 

“Can we see Bruce?” Tim asked, cutting off the two boys before they could resume their earlier argument. 

“Actually… about that…” Dick trailed off. Jason and Damian stopped glaring at each other and focused their attention on Dick, who smiled nervously. “I sent the invites. Bruce doesn’t know that you’re here.”

Jason groaned. Tim stared in unbelief. Damian’s already exasperated look somehow became more exasperated. 

“I knew something was up! Bruce hasn’t contacted me in years-” Jason started.

“Same here,” Tim said. 

“I have literally never spoken to Bruce Wayne,” Damian deadpanned. 

“Dick, I really can’t be here,” Jason said. “Bruce and I did not end on good terms, and I thought maybe this was his weird way of trying to amend things, but he doesn’t really even want me here, so-”

“Pleeeaase,” Dick keened. “It would mean so much for me to have you all at my wedding.”

“And why is that?” Damian asked.

“When I sent the invites, it was a long shot that you’d even reply, and now you’ve come all this way!” Dick exclaimed, evading the question. 

“Listen,” Tim interrupted. “You’ve obviously been through a lot of trouble trying to get us here, so why don’t we all reconvene on your boat?” he asked, nodding to Jason. 

“Nope,” Jason replied. “I just sat down.” 

“Guys-” Dick started, but cut himself off when he heard loud footsteps and off-key humming. “Oh shit. Bruce.” 

The three boys perked up, eyeing the trapdoor that led to where Bruce was loudly rummaging through stuff. 

“No,” Dick whispered. “No no no no no. He can’t know that you’re here! I have to go, but please please please stay up here." Dick moved towards the window before pausing and turning back around. "And promise me you won’t tell anyone I invited you!” 

“You got it, Goldie,” Jason shrugged. 

Dick panned his gaze to Tim. “It’s a promise,” he smiled. 

Dick mirrored the smile before turning to Damian. Damian evaded his eyes, huffing out a, “Fine.” 

“Awesome!” Dick grinned before opening the window. 

“How are you going to get out without him seeing you?” Tim asked. 

Dick winked and climbed out the open window. The three boys watched him clamber down the stone wall of the barn in disbelief. 

“He sure is nothing like Bruce,” Jason whistled, crossing his arms behind his head and laying back down on the thrown-together bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here she is !!! thx for the patience. 
> 
> next chapter bruce truly lives up to the dancing queen name


	4. Dancing Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You really are a dumbass, Todd,” said Damian.
> 
> “I better be dreaming,” Bruce deadpanned. “You better not be here.”
> 
> “Do you want me to pinch you, Bruce?” Jason asked.

After throwing back a few more glasses of cheap wine, loudly singing old Justice League songs, crying about Dick getting married, and making fun of Bruce, jet lag caught up with Clark and Diana, who passed out on the couch. Bruce maneuvered his way out of their pile, finally allowed to go fix the giant crack in the courtyard ground.

A little tipsy and a lot happy after drinking with his best friends, he hummed to himself as he entered the barn that housed more tools and random, useless objects than animals. Rummaging around several boxes, Bruce looked in vain for caulk to seal the crack.

A loud bang echoed through the barn followed by a not-as-loud shushing noise. Bruce absolutely did NOT jump, looking up to the ceiling where the noise definitely just came from.

He crept over to the door to the attic to investigate. He pushed the door to the attic up a couple inches, swearing to God if Dick and Wally had snuck up there again to-

All coherent thought vanished as he heard the hushed whisper, “Jason, you’re such a dumbass. What if he heard that?” He knew that voice.

“Fuck you, he pushed me!” was the quiet, yet rageful reply. He knew that voice too. That same angry voice had been used against Bruce before.

Bruce pushed the door a little higher until he could see the faces and-

Yep. Those were his sons.

What the hell?

He pushed the door all the way up, and it hit the wall with a bang. All three boys startled and turned to face him.

“What the hell,” Bruce said, squinting at the three. Jason, Tim, Damian.

“You really are a dumbass, Todd,” said Damian.

“I better be dreaming,” Bruce deadpanned. “You better not be here.”

“Do you want me to pinch you, Bruce?” Jason asked.

Ignoring Jason and climbing into the attic to stand over the boys, he clumsily asked, “Why are you- What are you doing here?”

“I’m writing a travel book,” Jason replied easily.

“Um. Spontaneous holiday,” Tim said, hesitating.

Damian just shrugged.

“What,” Bruce paused. “What is going on here.”

“You know,” Jason started, “just one of those strange moments in life when three strangers bond over something in common.”

“Strangers,” Bruce repeated.

“Yep,” Jason answered.

“You three don’t know each other?”

“That’s generally the definition,” Damian snarked.

“Well who said you could stay here?” Bruce asked, crossing his arms.

“Uh-” Tim started.

Jason interrupted, “Some Greek lady.” Tim nodded in agreement. “You know, now that I think about it, maybe she actually said we couldn’t stay here! She _was_ speaking Greek.”

“That must be it,” Tim agreed. Damian rolled his eyes.

“Yes, that _is_ it. You can’t stay here. The hotel is full. Also closed,” Bruce moved to pull open the attic door again. “I’m going to arrange for a boat to take you all back to the mainland.”

“I have a boat, Bruce,” Jason said.

“Good. Get on it.”

Bruce climbed back down the ladder, hurried out of the barn, and made a beeline to the bar.

 

***

 

“I’m old enough to be your mother,” Diana cooed to the bartender trying (and failing, apparently) to flirt with her.

“Grandmother,” Clark corrected easily. “You just woke up. Why are you still drinking?”

“Where’s Dick?” a voice suddenly appeared behind them, causing them to jump and turn around.

“Jesus, Bruce,” Diana scolded, clutching her drink to her chest.

“I think he and Babs went down to the beach,” the bartender, Roy, replied.

“What’s wrong, Bruce?” Clark asked, noticing the way Bruce was glaring at… something. Or maybe nothing? He was just glaring.

Bruce opened his mouth to reply, promptly shut it, and ran to the bathroom, locking himself in one of the stalls.

Clark and Diana were immediately off their barstools, following after Bruce.

Clark knocked on the stall softly. “Bruce?”

No reply.

“I have an idea,” Diana whispered. “Get on your hands and knees.”

“I don’t like this idea,” Clark replied, getting down anyways.

Diana stepped onto his back, peering over the top of the stall. She gasped softly. “Oh my God, sweetie, are you crying?”

Clark looked under the stall from his place on the ground. “Of course he’s crying. He’s drunk and emotionally compromised.”

Bruce sighed, wiped his nose, glared again, and pushed open the stall door, effectively knocking over the two.

“Bruce, you have to tell us what’s wrong,” Clark cooed as he got up from the ground.

Diana and Clark crushed Bruce between them. “We’re your best friends. You have to rely on us,” Diana reminded.

Bruce grunted. “It’s my son.”

“Which one?” Clark laughed.

“My real son. And my not real sons,” Bruce replied. “I never thought I’d see any of them again, much less all three of them at the same time!”

Diana and Clark stared at him in shock. “They’re all here?” they chorused.

Bruce nodded. “I found them in the barn attic. I have no idea what's going on.”

“Are you sure?” Clark asked. “Maybe you were having a drunk freak-out like that one time at-”

“I’m sure,” Bruce cut him off.

“Does Dick know?” Diana asked.

“No. And he’s not going to find out.”

“He’s wanted to know his brother all these years, hasn’t he?” Clark asked.

“You don’t know Dick like I do. Family is the most important thing to him, and I don’t want him getting hurt because his brother’s mom hates me and doesn’t want herself or her son anywhere near me,” Bruce grumbled. “Which makes this even more confusing. I don’t know why they’re here. Maybe God is playing a cruel trick on me for being a reckless, ungrateful slut.”

Clark and Diana burst into laughter. “Oh my God, who are you?” Diana choked out.

“Just because you’re living like a nun now doesn’t mean you were a slut then,” Clark laughed.

“What ever happened to our Bruce?” Diana teasingly sighed.

“Life and soul of the party!” Clark added.

Bruce squeezed himself outside of their embrace. “I grew up.”

“Well, grow back down again!” Diana exclaimed, jumping onto his back.

“Hmm… how does that one Justice League song go, Diana?” Clark asked.

Diana laughed. “I think it goes something like…” She jumped off Bruce’s back, whipping him around so she could point at him. _“You can dance!”_ she sang.

_“You can jive…”_ Clark joined.

_“Having the time of your life,_ ” they both chorused, shimmying towards Bruce. _“See that girl,”_ they sang, pointing at Bruce. _“Watch that scene! Dig in the dancing queen.”_

“Was that a smile I saw?” Diana cooed, pulling Bruce out of the bathroom and into the sunny courtyard. “Join in, dancing queen!” she exclaimed.

_“Dancing queen_ ,” Diana and Clark belted out, drawing the attention of all the other guests in the courtyard. _“Young and sweet only seventeen!”_ they sang, continuing to pull Bruce through the open hotel.

“Give or take a few years,” Clark added. Diana shushed him.

_“Dancing queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine_ ,” she continued.

_“Oh, yeah_ ,” Clark joined.

Bruce huffed out a laugh, being dragged through the hotel by his loudly singing friends.

“Bruce, we can’t sing this whole thing without youuuu,” Clark sighed, smiling at Bruce’s laughter.

_“You can dance! You can jive_!” Clark and Diana somehow managed to sing louder as they neared the boat dock.

_“Having the time of your life_ ,” Bruce finally joined. Clark and Diana cheered, stopping in the middle of the dock to bust out some moves.

_“See that girl_ ,” Diana sang, winking at Bruce. _“Watch that scene._ ”

_“Dig in the dancing queen!_ ” all three sang. Bruce laughed, smiling widely for the first time in a while, before shoving Diana and Clark into the water.

He followed them in, of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry but also not can't believe bruce wayne called himself a slut how IN CHARACter of him
> 
> thank you for all your comments and kudos! it means a heck of a lot to me!!! this is just for fun so i'm glad you guys like it. 
> 
> see ya soon byeee


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